The Co-parenting Programme is an early-intervention, preventative measure to improve the lives of the children of separated parents and to reduce parental conflict in post-separation relationships.
Providing separated parents with the skills to support & provide a positive, nurturing, mutually respectful, co-parenting environment within which their children can thrive at home, at play, and in education.
This is aimed at families that have recently separated or who have been separated for some time but are facing new triggers, such as new partners, a change in employment status, geographical change, health and mental wellbeing issues, and more.
We built a team of experts from education, government, health, law, psychology, and welfare, and through 2018-19, we worked with them to design a programme that took the best knowledge and experience in family separation and parenting, and combined it with the best knowledge and experience in educating and facilitating positive lasting behaviour change.
Working with our consultant panel we identified broad areas of need in terms of engaging and educating co-parents.
Each topic area is looked at in terms of providing a real-world example to centre the focus, elements of the theory, and crucially, a summary of key information to support learning retention and practical implementation.
This real-world application is key to the programme’s success.
The Co-Parenting Success! Workshop delivery is carried out by a team of two people; including a primary facilitator trained in educating groups, and a secondary facilitator who is also a Mental Health Counsellor.
This ensures a balanced delivery with complementary skill-sets that enables the programme content to be delivered efficiently to a group whilst also looking after the specific needs and wellbeing of the individuals within the group.
We talk about how to Focus on the children. How our legal system is literally adversarial and how we need neutral advice, not opposing cheerleading teams of friends and families.
How to be child-centric and ensure that the needs of the child are being met by the parents or independently from them.
How to recognise your responsibility in the process and how to transition from the intimate relationship to a positive working relationship.
We discuss Self-care, Emotional Management & literacy, therapy, and cycles of harm with short term vs long term solutions.
When you harshly criticize your spouse, or ex-spouse in front of your children, you are attacking their DNA.Psychotherapist, M. Gary Neuman
We talk about how if you are denying contact to the other parent, then you are denying half of the child’s identity to that child.
We look at Interconnected relationships, at how conflict affects children differently, how issues manifest and how their significance can be perceived differently by each party and why it’s important to recognise this.
We talk about effective communication skills how to move from emotional communications to transactional communications, and why late-night multi-page text messages are rarely ever a good idea.
We focus on a collaborative approach and make it clear that there’s the distinct lack of a trophy for being the ‘most right’ or having the ‘winning-ist’ email.
We look at how a child’s love is not finite and that you both have the opportunity to be the best parents. But that time is finite and we have to recognise that and the fact that you have to agree on how to share that time.
We talk about conflict, what triggers are, how to de-escalate any conflict.
What effective communications look like, about transactional analysis, the drama triangle, and good and bad assertiveness.
We talk about Cognitive reframing and explicit vs implicit behaviours, and our favourite game of all – let’s pretend – what would super-parent do?
We leave parents with practical tools including a Positive Co-Parenting Framework around establishing and maintaining a routine as the children’s worlds are turning upside down. About respecting each other’s homes and establishing boundaries.
We talk about how agreements should be agreed not dictated and what the eventual legal alternatives are should you fail to reach an agreement.
We try to protect your families’ futures by explaining about future triggers; new partners, varying arrangements, secondary school transition, new work locations, and more.
We work towards producing a Co-parenting Mission Statement – What is the adult you want to have produced after 18 years of parenting?